Simply Follow

Hope For Children

2009-03-24T16:36:00.000-07:00

Just when you had given up on me all together - I am BACK!
I am so excited because our church adoption/orphan ministry (we don't have a name yet) had our first event last weekend.
We did an event called Hope For Children. It was an informational meeting for those interested in adoption, foster care or child sponsorship. We had some reps from adoption agencies, from a local organization that does foster care and we had 2 people there for Compassion International. We also had the Michigan Heart Gallery displayed. It is photos of children in the Michigan Foster System that are available for adoption - we were able to put up the display at church on Sunday morning as well! It was primarily open house style, but we had everyone sit down for a 1/2 hour and had 3 people share their personal stories related to child sponsorship, adoption and foster care.
It was a great evening and it felt incredible to be getting things going with the ministry. We had some good conversations with those that attended and it was great to network with the agency reps!
Here are some pictures from the evening!

These are the wonderful woman that put on the event!

Here is one of the four Heart Gallery panels

These pictures are from church on Sunday morning!

Compassion

2008-11-10T11:43:00.000-08:00

Chris and I have sponsored a child through World Vision since we have been married. I have to admit that I was never really able to personally connect with them and that is all on me. Our "child" was aging out around the time we had started Becca's adoption, so we asked if we could now sponsor a girl from Guatemala. And really until just the past year or so, I found it difficult to connect even to her. Her picture is on our frig and we would mention her now and then. Last year, I had the kids make her pictures for the first time.
I stumbled across the blog of Shaun Groves and he has a passion for child sponsorship. Through reading his blog and some others, I have realized how truly significant it is and how much it matters to the children. A few months ago, David started talking about sponsoring a child, so we had him choose a child through Compassion. We will pay most of the monthly fee, but we will take some out of his allowance, with our goal being to have him pay a bit more each year until eventually he is able to support a child on his own. David chose a 7 year old girl in Guatemala named Nancy. David has sent her two letters with some photographs and he has sent her an email through the Compassion website. The biggest difference is that we have now committed to praying for both girls on a daily basis.
I am already dreaming about the day we can travel to Guatemala to meet them!
A group of people just recently went to the Dominican Republic with Compassion and they blogged about their time there - you can read them all here.
Shaun included this short video on his blog and I was able to share it with my children - WOW! is all I can say!

I also made a new friend online who is making dolls! They are called Compassion Friends and they are $36 - Abbie is donating $26 to Compassion's Global Food Crisis Fund to feed approximately 2 children living in poverty for a month. This is a GREAT gift idea for the holidays - I have ordered mine and can't wait to see them!
Check them out here!
I am so thankful to so many people who are doing so many awesome things to help kids in poverty and thankful that they are inspiring me and many others!
If you aren't already sponsoring a child - DO IT!

The Art of Listening Prayer - Part 2

2008-10-29T11:01:00.000-07:00

I am in the midst of reviewing a book by Seth Barnes called "The Art of Listening Prayer". Today I am posting on what I have learned from doing Day 8-16 in the 30-day study. I am obviously not doing this every day of the week, but it is making a large impact none-the-less.
Seth covers such issues as starting a conversation with God, and listening skills. He also talks about different ways that God speaks to us, through the Bible, through impressions, through others, visions, etc. It really helped me explore what I believe about how God communicates. It challenged me to take God out of a few boxes I had put him in. Seth shares a real life story at the beginning of each "day" and it helps to make it all more practical.
Day 10 is about our thought life. Asking the Lord to exchange our thoughts for his thoughts. I am praying for God to help me dialogue with Him throughout the day rather than being trapped in my own self-dialogue I tend to live with all day. It is not even that I consider my own self-dialaogue negative - it just that it is mostly focused on myself and my agenda - I am looking forward to letting the Lord's thoughts become louder than my own.
Day 15 is about following through. He compares our conversing with God to learning to communicate with our parents.
"Look at what a complex task it is to learn to communicate with our parents:
First we learn to recognize their voices.
Then we learn their vocabulary.
Then we decipher their meaning.
Then we learn to speak words.
Then we learn to interact.
Then we learn to respect and obey.
Ultimately in our 20's and 30's we may learn to communicate with our parents on a mature level."
This really gave me grace to realize what a process it is to communicate and converse with God. I believe He has been teaching me his language, by revealing His heart to me. I am so thankful for His patience and His grace!

The Art of Listening Prayer - Part One

2008-10-01T11:44:00.000-07:00

I have started the other book that was sent to me free with Red Letters (my review is below in 3 different posts). I received both of these books for free on the condition that I would blog about them and link the blogs of the authors!
I picked up "The Art of Listening Prayer by Seth Barnes thinking it would be a book to read. It turns out it is much more than that. It is actually a 30-day workbook. At first I thought - I don't know if I can really do this - I am already keeping up with Beth Moore's Believing God and BSF. But as I started to read the introduction I was drawn in. I am AMAZED at how God is so involved in ALL the details. As I have gone through the first 7 days of this workbook, the things that God is teaching me in all 3 of these studies are all intersecting, supporting each other and are a combination of exactly what God needs to do in me right now to prepare me for the journey He has before me!

The subtitle to the book is "Finding God's voice amidst life's noise". I am almost embarrassed to admit that I find the premise of this book so revoluntionary. The main idea is that when we pray and talk to God, we should then be quiet and wait for his response. Now, that part isn't what struck me as so new - I think at times I have prayed and then waited to hear God - and I do believe that God does speak.
The book has a few pages to read for each day with a concept to learn about communicating with God. Then there is a series of questions to ask God - not to answer them with my thoughts and wisdom, but I am to pose each of these questions to God and then wait for his response. By suggestion from the author I am using a journal to write out the questions - I am using one color for my questions and prayers to God. I am using another color for Scripture and anything I sense God is saying to me.

The principles in today's lesson - kind of sum up what I have learned - or been reminded of lately.

1. In normal personal relationships, dialogue is initiated by asking questions.

2. In normal personal relationships, after posing a question it is customary to expect a response and wait for it.

3. In normal personal relationships, the listener does not interrupt or allow distrations, but focuses his attention on the speaker.

4. In normal personal relationships we recognize the voice of the other party.

5. In normal personal relationships, people use a variety of means to communicate.

6. In an intimate friendship, there are expressions of affection and extended periodic conversation.

7. Honesty is important.

I feel like I have just begun to truly communicate with God. Today I had to confess to Him that I often think of prayer as similar to a lucky charm, like I mouth my prayers so that I am covered on everything and it is rare that I truly abide with, praise, connect, engage with or worship God in prayer.
It's exciting to realize again that God desires RELATIONSHIP with me a deep level.

I know that God is stirring my heart to a ministry of helping the oppressed and the "least of these". As I am waiting to see where He wants me to serve, He is drawing me into greater BELIEF, He is grounding me in His word, and now is drawing me into deeper intimacy with Him. Thank you Jesus!

Red Letters - Part 3

2008-09-19T11:36:00.000-07:00

So much happening right now! Glad to have a chance to talk about the last 3 chapters of Red Letters by Tom Davis.
Chapter 8 is entitled The Most Important Things -
Tom challenges us to consider what is on our list of the top 5 things that matter most to us. He then asks us to consider what may be on God's top 5 list and to see if they look similar! He speculates that God may be concerned about:

28 million children who die from curable diseases each year?

17 million children who die from malnutrition and starvation each year?

33% of the world's population that is malnurished?

20% of the world's population that has no access to safe water?

10 million children who are involved in the sex industry?

100 million children who live on the street?

200 child laborers?

If I am honest my Top 5 revolve around matters in my own kingdom, much more than God's Kingdom! By my time allotment, it would seem that my comfort and my well-being rank fairly high on the list. Of course, I am doing a lot of "good" things with my time and talents, but does my heart truly beat for the same things God's heart beats for? May it become so!
Tom then goes on to reference a scene from the movie Schindler's List. I saw this clip in church once and it really impacted me.

I think this speaks SO powerfully to how we spend our time and money. The way I look at my possessions has changed radically in the past year - and I have a long way to go. But I now view every purchase through the lens of "What could this money do to feed a starving child? To provide clean water? Do I really NEED to purchase this item? Am I building God's Kingdom or my own?

Tom goes on to talk about how doing nothing is harmful in itself. That silence really isn't "safe".

The last part of the chapter is about "Living Bigger Than Yourself". This is the longing of my heart. God has done so much for me and He has transformed my life. I know that I need to continue to be transformed, but I also need to understand that I was transformed for a purpose greater than myself - it is to be LIVED OUT by serving others. He asks what our personal legacy will be and what will be the legacy of our generation.

Chapter 9 is called Snapshots of Hope and is full of great stories of people who are living a faith that bleeds. He says "These people aren't millionaires. They aren't rock stars. They're just ordinary people who understand the importance of bringing hope to the hopeless." God has been driving this point home to me. HE USES ORDINARY PEOPLE!
I am ready to get OUT OF MY CHAIR!

Chapter 10 is "How to Bleed". In this chapter and in the "Additional Resources" Tom gives all kinds of nuts and bolts way to live out what he has challenged us to. Much of this can be found on his website as well.

I am so thankful that God is using ordinary people such as Tom Davis to do EXTRAORDINARY things for His Kingdom and for the hurting people of this world!
I am different for having read this book!

The life of Moses - bring it on!

2008-09-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

My local BSF class started today and I couldn't be more excited! Last year the kids stayed home with my mom because Becca was too young to attend. This year I am taking both the younger two and I've heard so many wonderful things about the children's program! I am so excited for them to learn about Moses along with me.

During the lecture portion this morning, the teacher gave an overview of Moses' life. This statement really stuck out to me -
"God has power to deliver his people from every kind of bondage and oppression" WOW! Do I believe that? And what part does God want me to play in helping his children be delivered?

She pointed out four character qualities that were evident in Moses

Prayerfulness
Courage
Humility
Faith

She said that without these characteristics we will not become GREAT LEADERS.

I am asking myself "Am I willing to let God make me a person of prayer, courage, humility and faith?

Of course, the Beth Moore "Believing God" study, that I am toward the end of, compliments all of this so miraculously.

Sometimes I am discouraged that I still don't know exactly where God wants me to serve - and then times like today I reminded again that it is a process and I know all THIS is preparation ground! Most importantly I am seeing so clearly that while I may benefit from what the Lord is teaching me, that is not the final purpose. The work the Lord is doing in me is for the purpose of BRINGING THAT HOPE TO THOSE THAT HAVE NONE - TO BE A VOICE FOR THOSE WHO AREN'T BEING HEARD!

Lord, please make me teachable so that others will find freedom!

Haiti

2008-09-09T05:53:00.000-07:00

My heart is heavy this week as I continue to keep up with the blogs of some missionaries in Haiti! They were already reeling from Fay, Gustav and Hannah, when Ike brought more rain this week. I don't think any of us can fully fathom what it must be like there. It is a huge struggle for people to survive, let alone thrive, BEFORE all these storms came through. MANY people have NO access to food or clean water - going on 6 days now!

Here is the link for the blog of Licia from the Rescue Center. Please take a moment to look at the pictures and hear the stories, but only if it will stir your heart to pray! There is a paypal link on their blog if you decide to help them financially!

Red Letters - Part 2

2008-09-03T11:27:00.000-07:00

FINALLY! I have a few moments of peace and quiet to finish writing about this wonderful book! Here is the link to my post about the first half of the book.

Chapter 6 is entitled "The Sanctity of Life". Tom spends time on two passages of Scripture - Matthew 25:41-45 and Jeremiah 29:11-14. In the Matthew passage God tells us that He IS that hungry, thristy, homeless, sick and imprisoned person. He doesn't just care for them He IS them. This is something I am still amazed by and again am realizing that it will be hard to "See God" as I so often ask and live my life "not seeing" the people He indwells!
The Jeremiah passage is special to me because it is the verse we claimed over Rebecca at her dedication before our church family. Verse 11 says the Lord has "plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for". These words from Tom really pierced my heart when I read them.
"Does the Jeremiah passage apply to everyone or just to those of us who live in weathly countries? Does it pack the same kind of meaning to people in developing countries; do they get to look forward to a hope and a future? Does it apply to the infant who was just infected with HIV through her mother's breast milk?"
I agree with Tom's conclusion that God makes that promise to every person and He desires to use US to embody that promise to a person in need. When we adopted Rebecca I felt like I had done my part in helping God in fulfulling this promise for her. Now I am realizing that it is MUCH more than that - there are many more that I need to help.

Chapter 7 is "Justice". God is obviously trying to open my eyes to the idea of JUSTICE. I can't wait to write about Gary Haugen's book about the International Justice Mission. Tom mentioned how his 7 year old has a strong sense of justice. I also have a 7 year old and this is very true. The phrase I am hearing a lot lately is "that's not fair". When did I grow out of it? When did I decide that I am entitled to a secure, comfortable life, but too bad for the rest of them? Although I would never say that out loud - I sense that God is shining a spotlight into my soul and helping me see that I don't see all His people as equals as having the same hopes and dreams. As Tom says
"Jesus believed that each person living on the planet has the right to be free, to live with dignity, to be safe, to receive care for their sickness or disease, and to be loved by the community".
Do I really live like I believe that statement? OUCH! It hurts to even write it out - although I may not be doing anything to actively oppress someone, by doing nothing I am an accomplice! Tom again quotes Mother Teresa,
"When a poor person dies of hunger, it has not happened because God did not take care of him or her. It has happened because neither you or I wanted to give that person what he or she needed. We have refused to be instruments of love in the hands of God to give the poor a piece of bread, to offer them a dress with which to ward off the cold. It has happened because we did not recognize Christ when, once more, he appeared under the guise of pain, identified with a man numb from the cold, dying of hunger, when he came in a lonely human being, a lost child in search of a home."
That quote is just ringing through my head and heart!
I thought I would blog the whole second half today, but I am just deciding to stop here for today. I sense I need to pause here awhile for myself and let this sink in to an even deeper level!

I miss blogging!

2008-08-26T17:22:00.000-07:00

I was really hoping my next post would be the second half of the Red Letters Book Review. The week before last the book was at hubby's office. This week is has been home, but I have literally not been able to find enough time when I am not in a vegetative state (after 8pm) to be able to write a coherent post.
I know only a few people even read this - but it's very theraputic for me and I love having a place to try to put words to what I am thinking and feeling (so many others do it so much more eloquently than I do!)
It's frankly been a really tough few weeks. My eldest son is REALLY ready to be back at school and he has required MUCH more of me than he usually does. We've had some good times together and some really good talks. We've also had some really ugly moments and I am finding that he is currently draining A LOT of my emotional and mental energy! MANY other people are dealing with MANY LARGER SCALE issues! What I am coping with PALES in comparison - like not really on the charts - to so much of the suffering in the world. And I am mostly able to keep this perspective. But sometimes I fall into that whole selfish pity party mode too!
I am really hoping that things will even out with him when he gets back to school. I am looking forward to having some quiet times in the afternoons with both boys at school and Becca napping (I am hoping she hangs on at least until Christmas).
I am in the middle of the Beth Moore Believing God study and it has been FANTASTIC! I am also reading Just Courage by Gary Haugen with the International Justice Mission. I will be starting BSF in a few weeks and studying the life of Moses. SO MUCH good stuff! So many thoughts and places that God is taking me that I haven't been able to process yet! Hopefully soon!

Food for thought and prayer

2008-08-13T12:59:00.001-07:00

Here is a article that Steven Curtis Chapman wrote for CNN.

A post from Jason at the Abba Fund

And Shaun Grove's wrote this post that really challenged me!

Thanks to all 3 of them for lighting a fire under me!

The Chapman Family

2008-08-08T13:02:00.000-07:00

I've been pretty quiet lately. It's just been a blah couple of weeks. I am frankly just trying to keep my head above water to keep my 3 children from screaming at each other all day (keepin' it real again). So that has involved becoming an activities director and not much time to myself! Which is all part of the package!
Anyways...I did manage to steal some time this afternoon (i.e. - the boys were both in front of a screen and every toy that Becca owns is in pile in our living room) to watch the footage of the Chapman family on Larry King Live last night. They were discussing the accidental death of their 5-year old daughter - she was run over in their driveway by their teenage son. There story is amazing - their faith is REAL and inspiring!
I have the utmost respect for this family. I believe they are the "real deal". They have adopted 3 girls from China and are HUGE advocates for adoption. Probably every adoptive parent mentions how they were inspired by the Chapmans and we are among them. We went to a day-long marriage conference in Colombus in November of 2003. We had dinner with the Allen's the night before and wanted to talk to them about their adoption and let them know that we were considering adoption. The next day at the conference - Steven Curtis Chapman did a mini-concert. At that point they had adopted and I was completely unaware of it. He and MaryBeth spoke about adoption and my tears flowed. That weekend confirmed for Chris and I that we would adopt!
Here is the link to the first part of the interview last night and then you can navigate to the other parts!

Wrapping it all up

2008-07-28T11:40:00.000-07:00

We've been back from Guatemala for a week now. Frankly the past week was awful! The kids were all having a tough week, and I was SICK! It's hard to keep up with our life when I am well, and having me sick all week was hard on everyone! I ended up at Urgent Care on Friday evening. As I figured, all they could tell me was that it was viral and to wait it out. Today I am finally feeling human again. As I eluded to in an earlier post I had times this past week where I wondered if it was all worth it! Well I can say with confidence that IT WAS WORTH IT! I can't imagine not having had the experience that we did!
What I most hoped for from this trip was to truly experience the culture and people of Guatemala. The wonderful thing about a mission/work trip vs. a vacation is that you have the opportunity to interact with the people in their real lives. I LOVED being with the people. What I learn from them is that "things" don't bring happiness. Did I know this before? YES! But it's one of those lessons we learn over and over and at different levels. I was very struck by the sense of community at the elementary school. The place seemed to be always filled with music and laughing. The kids were so willing to work right along side of us and they worked HARD and were enjoying themselves! They don't have a lot compared to what we have, as far as possessions go, but they are CONTENT! How I long to live in a place of being consistently CONTENT!
Space in general seems so different there - personal space, home space, etc. It's all smaller - hmmm...maybe that's why their relationships seem deeper, more cherished, more prioritized. I am still processing this aspect too!
Some things that have come out of our time there -
Chris and I both feel that we'd like to try to go to Guatemala at least every other year. We see this as a long-term relationship - an on-going partnership between our family and this beautiful country. We still don't know what that will look like - at what point can we start taking the kids? Will we always do missions? Will we partner with one organization? We are still sorting through that part of it.
I am inspired and motivated to improve my Spanish skills and to have the kids learn Spanish. I was able to speak enough to communicate, but not enough to converse. I feel that I missed out on some great relational time with the students & teachers at the school and with the "mamas" at the orphanage. I am working on getting Becca started on some Spanish classes for this fall.
My heart and mind were full as the plane lifted off in Guatemala. I asked the man sitting next to me if he was from "here" or "there" - his response was "both". I have tears even now when I realize how strongly God has bound my heart to that place and how I want that to be the answer I would give as well.

Below is a 3-minute video I put together of our time there. If you have read all the posts, you pretty much have it all. I did this mainly for our church famiy, so they could see the impact of their gifts and donations!

Guatemala Day 3 - Saturday, July 19th

2008-07-25T07:52:00.000-07:00

So when I left you at the end of the last day...we had gone to bed at the apartment at Eagle's Nest in Solola. When I got up in the morning I couldn't wait to go out in the living room and check out the view of the lake! When I looked out the window I could see NOTHING! That's right - we were completely fogged in! Well, it was only 6:30am - so I figured it would burn off - more about that later. We walked over to the orphanage at 7:00am and the place was already hopping! They have about 50 kids there - most are under a year and then there are just a few older kids. I believe that about 40 of these kids are matched with adoptive parents and just waiting for the process to be completed. New adoptions are closed for now in Guatemala, but those cases that began before the end of the year are grandfathered in, although the process has been quite SLOW! Most of the babies had been fed already, but I was able to give one baby her bottle "pacha". The local women that work with the children are called "mamas". The mamas were busy one-by-one taking the children back to be bathed and changed. As the kids came out, we and the other helpers (from the church group) were interacting with the kids. Reading stories, walking around with those learning to walk, etc. Chris and I looked at the clock at 9:00 and couldn't believe it had only been 2 hours. As much as we loved it, it was tiring work! The children are very well cared for, but you can tell they just crave that individual attention. Before we left, I emailed an adoptive mom that I met at the Orphan Summit, whose son was at EN and she got me in touch with several parents still waiting for their babies to come home. We were able to hug these precious babies and take some pictures to send to their waiting parents. I remember that during the waiting every picture was like GOLD!

Around 10:00 we went over the conference center. A church plant started at Eagle's Nest last December. They currently have a pastor, 6-8 women and 20 some children. The youth group from Illinois ran a VBS from 10-12 that they advertised through the church plant into the village. Several youth had gotten sick, so they were thankful that Chris and I were there to fill in some gaps! Around 80 children came and we followed one group of 23 kids from station to station. At the first station we sang songs - I was so excited when we sang "Yo tengo un amigo que me ama". My kids know this song from the Fiesta VBS CD we love to listen to. We also taught this song to the kids at Life Church. At the next station we helped them make a craft on a Meijer reusuable bag (felt just like home). The third station they did a story/skit and explained how to ask Jesus into your life. At the last station we (we meaning Chris) played soccer (futbol). It was great interaction with the kids! Once that ended we had lunch with the Illinios group.

It had been misting during the whole VBS time, but it cleared up a bit after lunch. We at least got a few glimpses of the incredible view from the "point".

Then it was back to the orphanage. By that time, it had quieted down a bit, as many of the babies were napping. We stayed there until our shuttle came to take us back to Antigua.
It was a long way to go for a 1/2 day, but the time was full and we really enjoyed learning about the ministry there!
We got back to Antigua just in time to meet the group for our final dinner. They all cheered when we arrived at the restuarant and were anxious to hear about our time at Eagle's Nest. Then we got to hear about their volcano hike and the tour of the coffee plantation. After dinner we went back to the hotel and debriefed about the trip. It was hard to say goodbye to such a wonderful group as it felt we had connected so quickly. Everyone had to catch early shuttles to fly out the next morning.
I'll do one more post tomorrow about all my final thoughts as I have still been processing it all!

Re-entry has been brutal!

2008-07-24T05:32:00.000-07:00

I was planning to blog about our last day yesterday - but it didn't happen. I am hoping to later today.
We got home around mid-night on Sunday. We had a sitter here with the kids til we got home - so that we would be altogether in the morning. The boys came bounding in at 6:15 - with lots of hugs and snuggles. My seven year old told us that
"Grandparents are great, but nothing makes up for mom and dad"! Chris took Monday off - thankfully - I would not have made it! I felt really tired all day, but figured I was just recovering. Tuesday I felt a bit better in the morning, but still really tired and achy. The kids are all having a rough time. Becca has been whiny and clingy and I think she is getting her molars. The boys have been unable to get along for more than 2 minutes and just seem out-of-sorts. Yesterday I started feeling worse, my throat went from irritated to PAINFUL and around dinnertime I realized I had a fever. I am guessing I picked something up from the kids in the orphanage as a few of them were sick! I have gone to bed at 8:00 the last 2 nights!
I would not trade our trip for the world! But I am stuggling with how hard our being gone was on the kids! In my heart I know we were supposed to go, but it's hard to have it be like it has been this week! Just continuing to keep it real!

Guatemala - Day 2 - Friday, July 18th

2008-07-22T11:08:00.000-07:00

Before getting into the events of the day - I want to talk about a bit about Healing Waters and what they do. First of all, our experience traveling with them was top-notch! They did a fantastic job of arranging the schedule, the hotels, the meals and the transportation. Liz, from their Colorado office, Daniela, the in-country respresentative and Laura, an intern from Colorado, were all GREAT and we loved getting to know them. There were so gracious to help us work out getting to the orphanage and back. They had pre-paid cell phones we could use to call home and even insisted we take one as we traveled to Solola.
We learned that 95% of the water supply in Guatemala is contaminated. Even if the municipal water may be clean, by the time it travels through the infrastructure, it is contaminated coming into the homes. The solution is to buy bottled water from the stores (which is safe), or to buy water off of delivery trucks (not always safe). A 5-gallon jug in the stores costs $2 or about 15 quetzales. HW sells the same amount for about 50 cents or 4 quetzales. The systems which are built into the churches are donated by individuals, churches or businesses in the US. Of the 4 quetzales - 2 are used to cover the cost of maintaining the systems - 1 quetzal goes to cover the cost of HW adminitration and 1 quetzal is given back to the church. The churches are encouraged to use these funds to serve their communities. The pastor we talked with has used their funds to give scholarships to the Christian school that is housed in their church. They have also bought computers for local schools. HW currently has 19 systems in Guatemala. Normally they bring down teams for the inaguration of a system. We were the first team to come when they weren't doing a grand-opening, which is why they set up the service project at the elementary school.

Back to the day. Friday morning we had breakfast at the truly authentic Guatemalan restaurant named Bagel Barn! (note sarcasm here) I think it was the first time I have ever had black beans on a bagel though! Then we headed out to the school. We were able to jump right in where we had left off and knew a lot more what we needed to do this time!
I was able to help with a special project that took up most of my time there that day. HW bought a photo printer, and we took a digital picture of each of the students and teachers individually. Frames were purchased for each person and the kids each decorated their own. For many of the children, this was the first picture they had of themselves. (HW has also done this in the churches and provided free famiy pictures for the members!) It was SO much fun to work with the children on this project.

Chris was able to hang some basketball nets, and also helped with painting the lines on the basketball court and he helped paint the soccer (futbol) goals. Others finished the mural, the Mayan calendar and some more planting.

The school day starts at 7:30 and ends at 12:30. Right before the children left they did a ceremony to close out the week (they also do one on Monday morning to start the school-week). School in Guatemala runs from January to October. There are public schools but they are in VERY poor shape. Almost all the kids go to private schools, they are run by the communities and the tuition range varies greatly.
Here are pictures from the ceremony.

After that, we pumped up all the balls that our team had brought down. We were also able to present the teachers with our suitcase packed with supplies that were donated by Life Church. They were very excited about the supplies - just before we left the director of school came and when he saw all that was in the suitcase - he was also very excited! You can see the repainted basketball courts and the bright yellow soccer goals. Chris really enjoyed playing with the kids!

We had some lunch and then the rest of the team was heading to visit some ruins in Iximche. Chris and I took a taxi back to Antigua - did an hour of power-shopping in Antigua and then caught the shuttle to go to Lake Atitlan. What an amazing drive it was. I don't know if I can even describe it. For the first hour or so we drove through some smaller towns. The towns are so different from America. The streets are narrow and there are cars, vans, chicken buses, motorcycles, people on bikes, stray dogs and people walking seemingly all in the same space. It is fascinating to witness, and it doens't phase any of them to be sharing the same small place. The last hour or so was true mountain driving - hilly, curvy, bumpy - no houses or towns. The scenary is beautiful, lush and green. As we get close to Lake Atitlan it is starting to get dark. We see a few glimpses of the lake (surrounded by volcanos) as the sun is setting. By the time everyone else gets off the shuttle in the town of Panajachel it is dark and the night-life is hopping! Now it's just us and the Spanish-speaking driver and some written directions (not even an address) to Eagle's Nest in Solola. It's about a 15 minute drive and we do manage to find the place! It's about 8:00 when we get there - the orphanage is quiet and we meet the American couple that help there and get settled into our apartment. The orpahanage was built in 2004 - the other part of the property, which includes condos, a dining hall/conference center and cabanas that have been made into dormitories is a defunct time-share. It is up on a point, cliff, over-looking the lake. Our apartment has large windows that look over the lake and I can't wait to get up in the morning to see the view. There is a team of 26 people there from a church in Illinois. We meet a few of them and find out that breakfast is at 7:00am.
It was another amazing and fulfulling day!

Guatemala - Day One

2008-07-21T14:47:00.000-07:00

This was written on Thursday, July 17th.
We are here in Guatemala! Everything went great yesterday with our flights and the staff from Healing Waters, Aguas de Unidad, met us at the airport. We had the chance to talk with them and another couple on the ride to the hotel in Antigua. We settled in, rested a bit and met more of the group for dinner.

Chris & I in the center of Antigua

The view from the hotel balcony

We started out early this morning for breakfast. It was the same restaurant where we had lunch 2 years ago when we visited Antigua with Rebecca. I got weepy at breakfast, just being so thankful to be here. After breakfast, Daniela, who is on staff here with HW gave us an orientation about the culture and history of Guatemala and then about HW. Then we drove to Chimaltenango to the elementary school. The school has about 50 students K to 6th grade. When we arrived they had a presentation for us. Several of them played songs on the marimbas, maracas, etc. One girl recited a poem and then the children performed a Mayan dance. I can´t describe how enjoyable it was!

Then we got to work. Chris worked with a few others on recementing the entryway. A few others helped repaint the lines on the basketball court. A few others began painting a mural on the courtyard wall. I was in the group that did flower planting, ok mom, you can stop laughing. The kids all helped us, they dug the holes and we put in the flowers and plants.

I brought some little bottles of nail polish and was able to paint some of the girls fingernails and even the nails of some of the teachers. It was great one to one time to connect. A lot of Spanish has come back as I hear it.
From there we had lunch with a family that uses the water from the water systems. Their home is connected to a small restaurant and we all ate in their backyard. The pastor and his wife and 2 daughters were there and there was a lot of conversation with them about the water system and how it has impacted their church and the community. More about that later. Then we went back into Guatemala City to see a water system and how it operates. One couple from our group has personally co sponsored that system it was special for them to see it in person.

ETA: I want to talk more about the water systems and how it all works, so I will start with that on the Day 2 post!
We made a few stops for supplies for more work at the school tomorrow and then came back to Antigua for dinner.
I don´t know if I can fully put into words how wonderful today was. It was the feeling of being in EXACTLY in the place where I was meant to be. Being completely in the moment, soaking in every interaction, being at the point of tears because I am so amazed to be here and to have this experience.
Tomorrow we will work for a few hours at the school and then Daniela will bring us back to Antigua and we will take a bus to the orphanage which is near Lake Atitlan. We will spend the night at an apartment at the orphanage and help a group that is already there with a Bible school for the kids on Saturday.
Time to go, I can honestly say this was one of the best days of my life! I am grateful!

Guatemala bound!

2008-07-15T04:12:00.001-07:00

Chris and I leave EARLY tomorrow morning for Guatemala. You can read this post to find out more about our trip. The kids will all be situated in grandparent's homes by the end of the day! I mostly have the kids packed and I think all the donations are packed and weighed. Families from our church brought in school supplies for us to give at the elementary school and clothing and shoes for the orphanage!
At the time of my first post about our trip - we weren't sure if we would be able to go to an orphanage. We were able to arrange to spend Friday night at Eagle's Nest in Solola. We learned about this ministry from Angel (this post has a video of her trip to Eagle's Nest) and Amy. I am SO looking forward to our time at the orphanage - but there is a part of me that knows how hard it will be!
Chris and I still need to pack and of course I have lists of other small errands, etc that need to get done before we attempt to go to bed early tonight! We are not going to have a computer with us - but I will get an update out on Monday!

Church adoption/orphan ministry!

2008-07-15T03:58:00.000-07:00

Although we are not yet an official ministry of our church we had our first major event! A few of us have been meeting to pray over the past several months. Then Aimee and I attended the Orphan Summit. On Sunday we had a pool party social event and invited those interested in being a part of an adoption/orphan ministy! We had a great turn-out and more importantly a lot of great conversation. As a ministry we desire tooperate in 3 channels. The first is adoption. We want to be a source of information and support for those who are interested in adopting. We also want to provide ongoing care and support for those in process and beyond. We are also hoping soon to start an adoption fund! We have been in conversation with the great folks at Abba Fund and are excited about what that can mean for future adoptive families. The second channel is orphan care. Not everyone at our church may be called to adopt, but we are all called to care for the orphan. We hope to connect our church to a village/church/orphan home, most likely in Africa, where we make multiple trips and have mutually beneficial cross-cultural relationships. The third channel is foster care. To start out, we are hoping to come alongside some foster parents in the area and help them meet some practical needs. Long-term we would love to see our church become a place that recruits, trains and supports foster parents.
Anyone else out there? I would love to hear about other churches doing adoption/orphan ministries!

Red Letters by Tom Davis - Part 1

2008-07-10T11:47:00.000-07:00

Last fall my friend Aimee sent me a link to Tom Davis' blog. He had just released his new book "Red Letters" and I had heard about it on some other blogs/forums. I still hadn't had a chance to read it and then I heard that Tom Davis and Seth Barnes were both offering free copies of their latest books if the recipients would agree to blog about what we learned! So I jumped at the opportunity!

I have almost finished Red Letters, but don't know if I'll be done before our Guat trip (next week). So I decided to split the book in two and write about the first 1/2 of it before leaving.

The full title is "Red Letters - Living a Faith that Bleeds".
Tom starts out by apologizing to the 50 million people infected with HIV/AIDS on behalf of the Christian church for our lack of help. I have personally had to ask forgiveness to God for my general apathy toward the "least of these" in our world. I am not sure why I have been so blind for most of my Christian life. Now that my eyes have been opened the Scriptures just seem to scream that Jesus' heart was turned toward the poor & oppressed. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I spent the past school year in BSF studying the book of Matthew. Over and over again, Jesus spends his time ministering to the outcasts of society - women, children, poor, crippled & diseased.
One of main truths that has stood out to me from this book and the other reading I have done lately is that when we minister to the outcasts of society we meet JESUS! How often do we say to God "I just want to know you, to see you, to experience you". I sense that God is telling me that if I get out there with the people that He has called us to minister to I will find Him in them. It seems such a paradox, but it is just like God to work that way. Tom quotes Mother Teresa "The dying, the crippled, the mentally ill, the unwanted, the unolved - they are Jesus in disguise... [Through the] poor people I have an opportunity to be 24 hours a day with Jesus." This inspires me, although I am still lacking in experience.
Tom goes on to explain poverty. "Poverty is having very little food to eat. Poverty is having lack of shelter. Poverty is being sick and not being able to see a doctor. Poverty is not having access to school and not knowing how to read. Poverty is losing a chid to illness brought about by unclean water."
He wonders why with so much wealth at our disposal in America we tend to hoard and protect our wealth rather than acting on behalf of the poor in this world. Tom challenges us to live with a "What can I offer?" mentality, rather than a "never-enough" mentality.
Tom reminds us of the way that Jesus views the world. He lived COMPASSION - even after He had given and given He still gave. "He knew they were all created in God's image. He knew they had eternity marked in their hearts. He knew they were capable of so much more than what they were currently living for. And he knew they had a destiny to fulfill". Can I see each person on this earth through that lens? Especially when I am worn out and beaten down?
In the third chapter Tom brings the focus on Africa. He gives a brief historical overview of how present-day Africa has gotten to where they are - covering the tradegies of slavery and genocide and HIV/AIDS. It is hard for me to admit that I have been so unaware of atrocities that are happening even currently to my "neighbors" in Africa. It is appalling to me that people could think that Africans are an inferior race - yet although I don't actively oppress Africans, my lack of action is also a disgrace.
The fourth chapter explains that HIV/AIDS in now defined as pandemic. "A pandemic is an epidemic over a wide geographic area that affects a large proportion of the popualation". Africa represents 10% of the world's population, and also represents over 60% of people with HIV. The church MUST become involved in this crisis. The church brings something that no other organization or government can offer - HOPE!
The fifth chapter is titled "An Inadequate Response". How do we move beyond the statistics - which only temporarily cause our hearts to stir - and begin to make a difference? Tom points out that we are overwhelmed both by the magnitude of the problem and by the pace of our lives. He uses the passage about the Good Samaritan. I feel like this passage has come over and over for me recently! I used to think of it in more of a figurative sense, but lately I see it as much more literal! There are people beaten and dying and I go about my life in such a way that I never have to look at them.
This paragraph from Tom jumped off the page for me. "So why don't we do more to help others? Sadly, many of us live in a world of shadows. In the realm of shadows, we seek only those things that help us to remain in the fog of comfort and safety. This isn't to say that comfort and safety are bad things, but when we fall into the trance of believing they are the only things, we become isolated from greater truths. Two things keep us in the shadows: discomfort with interruption and fear". This would describe my life up until this point. If I am honest, personal comfort and safety have been VERY high on my list of priorities. I wonder how many amazing adventures & blessings I have already missed out on, or withheld from others out of my discomfort and fear?
There's so much more I could say and quote - and it's gets even more challenging as I get into the second part! I am hoping that in my life I begin to move furthur out of the shadows and that my one life can make a difference for the Kingdom.
I know that I have the opportunity to live this out in my neigborhood, but I am also looking forward to this faith adventure in Guatemala. I know that God will continue to stretch me and open my eyes and soften my heart and use me for His will, for HIS glory and purposes!

Do you ever?

2008-07-03T13:51:00.001-07:00

Read someone else's post and think - THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY - why can they put in into words so much better than I can????
This is what I read today.

Getting Real About Food (and a few other things)

2008-07-02T12:04:00.000-07:00

My friend Angel put out a challenge for us today to GET REAL about our lives. I have been giving a lot of thought to a particular issue lately - so this is my impetus to try to put this in writing!
Before I get to the particular issue - I'll be real about a few other things! Having 3 kids is the hardest thing I have ever done! I know I had rough "mommy moments" when I just had one or when I had two - but they have been much more common in the past two years! Overall I LOVE being a stay at home mom and really wouldn't change it for the world - but dang, it is HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There are sometimes when it can feel so monotonous - especially in the mornings - get up - get everybody fed, get everybody dressed - keep the boys from beating on each other! Keep everyone's voices down enough so that the neighbors don't call social services! (this has crossed my mind a lot lately since the window's are open now) I have really been faced with my selfishness a lot lately! I realize that a lot of what drives me crazy in my kids behavior are things that I see in myself - reflected by them! I am trying to teach them that they cannot control what others do, but only their responses and reactions to that - and how often do I react and respond in sinful ways - A LOT - would be the answer to that! I wish I could control everything they do and have them act in the right way all the time - but guess what - THEY DON'T! And it is my choice in how to respond to it. One positive is that I really try to admit my mistakes to my kids and I often do apologize and ask for forgiveness. I hope this is helping them to keep it real and be able to admit mistakes!
Now onto the other issue!
FOOD!
I LOVE FOOD! I LOVE TO EAT! Thankfully I am a healthy weight for my age and height - but it is something that I constantly struggle with. Several years ago I read "Weigh Down" and it made a lot of sense to me. The basic idea is not that foods are not inherently "bad" or "good", but that we should just eat when we are hungry and just eat enough to satisfy that hunger - not to be full. A few years later I went through a summer long small group with a group of women and we went through a similar book. It was good to talk about it with other women. My friend who led the group had lost 100 lbs mainly through the above philosphy. We talked a lot about using food for comfort and as a way to insulate ourselves from feelings -much the same way an alcoholic or drug addict uses those vices to escape from reality.
Fast forward to today. I have seasons in my life where I eat well and feel good and my clothes fit well, etc. I have other seasons where this is not so much the case. Until a few weeks ago I was in the latter season. On the other hand my DH has been a madman! He joined a gym 17 months ago and now has a trainer at work (lucky him!). He has lost 27 lbs and is looking and feeling great. His training suggested trying this 21-Day Jumpstart Plan and it is a very specific food plan. I am generally not in favor of this type of thing - but to make this somewhat shorter - I decided to do it along with him! I figured it wouldn't hurt to have my pants fit a bit better and to sort of detoxify my body from all the junk it had gotten used to lately.
OF COURSE, GOD had much more than that in store for me.
I am on Day 18 - for eighteen days, I have had no breads, no dairy and no sugar (not even fruit!). I do feel physically better and yes, my clothes are fitting well again. But the biggest things has been realizing how much I make food an IDOL! I can't tell you how many times I have just longed to eat something sweet or snacky! Is it because I am hungry? NO!!!!!!!!! It has made me look hard at this and realize that it is because I want the HIGH that will come with eating that particular food! It feels yucky to even type that out. It is helping me see again how broken and selfish I am. The days are stressful with the kids and this is often what I find my comfort in! The interesting thing is that I rarely hear this talked about in Christian circles - in fact, many times getting together with Christians is often focused on lots of food (generally the unhealthy stuff). If eating to satisfy an emotional need is SIN then we invite each other into more often than we know! I am not trying to say that we should not enjoy our food, or have meals together- eating together is a HUGE part of many cultures and there are many good things about it! I just wonder how often we sweep this SIN under the rug!
So back to my struggle. In these past few weeks, I have been at times quite irritable (in withdrawl) because I am being denied my comfort from food. How this has made me see how much I am NOT turning to God to fulfill all my needs. This time around I have also thrown in the layer of the awareness of hunger in the world. Even though I can only eat certain things - I still have a pantry and frig full of them. How dare I be irritable and grumpy about not being able to have my favorite things when so much of the world has NOTHING to eat! Again, this isn't about a guilt trip - I am just trying to peel back the layers of this issue and call it what it is!
I am still majorly in process in all of this and I know it will require daily choices for my whole life.
Any other thoughts out there? Am I the only one?

Dangerous Surrender - Chapter 3

2008-06-27T12:14:00.001-07:00

Gloiously Ruined -
I am struggling a bit, because although I KNOW I am officially "seriously disturbed" - I am not sure yet that I am "gloriously ruined". Kay says, "you won't become gloriously ruined sitting in your living room" - ouch - that's where I am right now!
Over the past year a lot of the ways I have become "seriously disturbed" is by reading the blogs of many others that are "gloriously ruined" (or are on that journey like me) and I have been able to do that from my living room! I know that it is part of the process and work He has been doing in me but now...I am CONFIDENT that God is calling me OUT of the living room and I believe He has been preparing me for quite some time!
I have recently started to take some smaller steps OUT, yet I know He is calling me to MORE! God is developing in me a heart of compassion that I have never had before. I still have a lot of growing to do in the ACTION department. It is one thing to feel something when I read about suffering, it is quite another for me to step into someone's suffering. I still have fear, I still have my guard up - I'm still not quite sure what it looks like when I am the one God uses to bring hope to a suffering soul. But I know I WANT it - because I have become convinced that I will MEET GOD there. And isn't that always the cry of my heart - "God, I want you - I want to know you more". I believe He is telling me that that is HOW I will find Him and that is WHERE I will find Him.
This trip to Guatemala is going to be a stepping stone on the journey. I am so thankful that I am taking this trip with my husband and that we can have this experience together. We both sense that there are some new things on the horizon for us as a family and are seeking God to be in the center of His will.

Back to Guatemala

2008-06-23T10:24:00.001-07:00

Chris and I made the decision just last week! We are going on a 5 day missions trip to Guatemala in mid-July!
Since last fall I had been praying about a missions trip for this summer and I really was hoping to go to Guatemala. I spent LOTS of time online trying to find opportunities. I ended up finding a church in our demonination and in our area that was taking a team in June. I contacted them and was pretty sure this was IT! The day before I needed to make a commitment to the trip, Chris and I both decided that I wouldn't go at this time (the Orphan Summit had just come up and we decided that I would go to that instead). I was bummed about not going to Guat. but was at peace with the decision. Of course, God still has His hand in all of it. I ended up getting to meet Shelli, who was organizing the team and another friend of hers Kathy, that is adopting from Ethopia (amazing story - check out their blog!) They both attend different churches in the area and are interested in having adoption/orphan ministries at their church, so we know the Lord intended for us all to meet!
Now about THIS trip! Last fall I watched this video and it really made an impact on me! We made a donation to Healing Waters International They are a Colorado-based nonprofit that provides clean water to the urban poor of Guatemala, Mexico, and the Dominican Republic by installing water purification systems in local churches. The churches then sell the safe, purified water -- at a greatly reduced price -- to the people in their neighborhoods. Instead of living with intestinal sickness caused by contaminated water, people who couldn't otherwise afford clean water are now able to get it. Along the way, they get connected with their local church. The churches, in turn, are given a great way to reach out to and care for their communities. It's a brilliant concept that meets physical, financial, and spiritual needs...all at once.
A month or so ago we received an email from them about a trip to Guatemala! Chris and I both read it and said "let's go". We took awhile to pray about it and last Monday took the plunge and bought plane tickets! Thanks to our wonderful family and church friends our children will be well cared for while we are there!
The couple in the video went to a grand opening of a purification system - our trip will be a bit different. We will have the opportunity to visit 2 of the churches with the systems. We will learn about them, talk to the pastors about how it has impacted their church and community and also have a meal with a family that has used the water and learn about their lives. We will also spend time serving at an elementary school in the area. The last day is planned for the group to do some sight-seeing, but Chris and I are working on spending that day at an orphanage!
We are so excited and I can't wait to truly experience Guatemala and connect with my daughter's birthcounty!

A Miraculous Friendship

2008-06-15T13:14:00.000-07:00

This is about a friendship between 2 little girls. One born in China and one born in Guatemala. Through an amazing set of circumstances (some joyful and some painful) the Lord has brought both these girls to forever families in Michigan. Sometimes it is completely ordinary to see them playing together, but other moments when you think it all through - it can also take your breath away! Under what other circumstances would these 2 little girls ever have the chance to become friends?
Here they are playing together the other day!
(Becca is in white and Sophie is in yellow)

I would be remiss not to mention Sophie's mom, Aimee. I'm so grateful to have a friend who "gets me" and who is walking the same paths of ministry with me! Thank you for your miraculous friendship!

Following or waiting?

2008-06-13T12:57:00.000-07:00

I am so eager to follow God's footsteps - but He hasn't yet told me where I am going.
It's been a fairly "blah" couple of weeks. As it happens - I was SO excited after returning from the Orphan Summit. I was ready to take on the world - now I feel like I am back in the dealing with the "everydayness" of life.
I still struggle to find the balance of it all. Is God going to send me out with a mission for Him when I still struggle at home with selfishness, when I don't prioritize my husband, when I lose my patience with my children? I only have to look at the disciples to know the answer to that question. God using me isn't dependent on me getting my act together - but it is still something I struggle with.
Lord, help me be faithful with the mission at hand - in my home - and help me to know where you are leading.

Real Hope for Haiti

2008-06-05T19:40:00.000-07:00

I don't even remember how it all happened. Those of you in "blogland" know what I mean. You start on one blog that links you to another and to another and then you say - I found this great blog, but you're not really sure exactly how you got there!
Sometime last fall, I bumped into a blog by the Livesays - they are ministering in Haiti and I was immediately hooked by their "realness". I was also instantly drawn to Haiti and it's people. From the Livesay's blog I was linked to Licia and Lori's blogs. The work that they are doing for the people of Haiti is amazing. There have been so many times that their blogs have made me cry. Sometimes the tears are for the people they help and sometimes the tears are for my own heart that would have rather not known or seen the suffering of the world and for the apathy that still can plague me.
More recently I stumbled across the blogs of Aaron and Jamie Ivey - they have been to the Rescue Center and are in the process of adopting two children that live there. They started a grassroots blogging campaign to raise awareness and funds for the Rescue Center! Chris and I were excited to be able to become involved with this ministry.
So much of my heart is in Guatemala, but a piece of it now also resides in Haiti, and I hope someday I will be able to see these ministries in person.
For more info on the Real Hope for Haiti Campaign - please visit here.

Living simply to give more

2008-05-30T11:06:00.000-07:00

A major theme of my past year has been dealing with issues of money and possessions. As I have been exposing myself to so many needs around the world it becomes apparent that the way I live is far superior to MOST of the world. Back in the fall my husband found a website that allows you to put in your annual income and see where you stand compared to the rest of the world. Guess what? If you make more than 50,000 you are in the top 1% of the weathliest people in the world. That really got me thinking last fall. It made me think of the verse from Matthew 19:23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." I have never defined myself as rich. Movie stars are rich, millionaires are rich. Guess what? I AM RICH! So where does that leave me in connection to Matthew 19:23? Thankfully the next verse says 25When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, "Who then can be saved?" 26Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." I am still grappling with this whole issue of money and how it all looks as an American Christian. Sometimes I am concerned that we are VERY far from where God wants us to be with this.
As a family, I would consider us to be generous and faithful givers, and people who live within our means. We also do not have money worries and stress, and although we are by no means extravagant spenders, we still spend money on things that we don't really NEED and can easily justify or rationalize these purchases. In the past few months we have made changes to really evaluate what we spend and why and are continuing to find ways to spend less. The key is though - we are not doing this to be FRUGAL! We are doing this so that we can free up more resources to go to KINGDOM work! (and to be kinder to the environment) When I compare the cost of buying a new outfit to what that money could do to provide food, or shelter, or live-saving medicine it is starting to become a no-brainer.
This past week in our small group we discussed this passage from Mark 12 - 41 Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. 42 But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins,[j]worth only a fraction of a penny.[k] 43 Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. 44 They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on."
This really challenged me because in a lot of ways we are still giving "out of our wealth" - she gave all she had to live on - really ALL she had to live on? Do you really want me to give that way Lord? As I laid in bed that night thinking this over again - God reminded me that it is about so much more than MONEY - she put in everything - God doesn't just want all of my money - he wants ALL of ME! To give of myself beyond my comforts or beyond my need to be right or first.
I have come a long way in the past year, yet I still have so far to go!
I came across the blog of Shaun Groves recently and he has had 2 great posts about how he and his family are moving toward simple living!

Matthew

2008-05-27T13:48:00.000-07:00

After quite a long stretch of years leading women's Bible studies through church - I decided last summer to take a year off from leading! It is always a hard decision, but I knew I was at a crossroads and that I needed to take a year to seek God about a new direction I felt He was leading me toward. I had heard a lot from friends about BSF - Bible Study Fellowship and I had always wanted to try it, but it just didn't fit in the schedule. I was able to join this past fall for the study of Matthew. Last Tuesday was our last meeting. I would HIGHLY recommend BSF - now I know why so many of my friends spoke so highly of it. Studying Matthew over the past 8-9 months has been so rich for me. Especially the first few months, I felt like I was being replenished and that I had recaptured my first love. Studying the life of Jesus has re-grounded me and helped me get back to the basics of my faith.
The following are some of the passages that were most challenging to me:
From Matthew 5
Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Of course, I have heard these verses many times, but as we studied this section I was amazed at how far I am from living this out. During that time, I memorized these verses and they both challenged and ministered to me. Reading it now, it draws me back to that idea of suffering - in the midst of suffering is where we can find the most blessing (you mean not in my comfortable suburban life???).

Another passage is from Matthew 10
37"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; 38and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
In our review lesson, I picked this as the hardest command for me from the book of Matthew. I am a PLEASER and I like it when everyone in my life agrees with and affirms the decisions I make. I am coming to learn that following God's will for my life may not make me popular with all those I hold dear. I am solely accountable to please God and to follow His leading at any cost. I am still on a major journey with this one!

There are 3 parables in Matthew 25 - the first one is the parable of the 10 virgins and the main idea is being prepared for Jesus' return. It made me think a lot about how I spend my time, resources, etc and to be more anticipatory. A lot of the time in studying Matthew - I am all frustrated with the Pharisees - wondering how if they knew the Scriptures so well that they weren't recognizing the Messiah. I had the thought that someday someone might say that about us. There is so much Scripture and prophecy concerning Jesus' second coming, but because there has been so much time, we have a false sense of security and live as if it isn't imminent.
The second parable is the parable of the talents. The part that has resonated most with me is from the master's response to the first two servants that were able to multiply the talents they were entrusted with - 21"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
As I sense that there is a new calling ahead for me, God keeps reminding me to be "faithful in the small things". I was sharing this with a friend, and I said that to me the small things were everyday things, like being a godly wife, mother and friend. She gently reminded me that those aren't really "small" things. I agree! But we went on to talk about how important it is to be faithful with what we have been given.
The third parable is the Sheep and the Goats - this is used a lot when talking about serving the poor, widow and orphan. I am challenged to start getting into the trenches! Do I know these people? Am I visiting the sick and the imprisoned? Am I meeting the needs of the hungry and the thirsty? I long to know God - I pray that He would show me who He is. I say Lord, please reveal yourself to me. As I prayed through the material for the foster care vigil - I realized again that Jesus is in these children - when we serve the least of these - we meet Jesus!

May is Foster Care Month

2008-05-16T13:29:00.000-07:00

I have not been able to stop thinking about all I learned about foster care at the Orphan Summit a few weeks ago! My parents fostered 2 teenage siblings that were friends of friends before I was born. Just as I have always wanted to adopt since I was a young girl I have always been interested in the idea of fostering children as well!
The images in the videos from 4 Kids of South Florida keep playing through my mind. I especially think about the moment that children are taken from their home. I can't even imagine all that a child goes through in those moments - extreme fear and confusion - maybe for some even relief? What I wonder most is if they think THEY did something wrong. How could they not? They are a young child and the police come and take them away in a car - they take them to the police department and take their fingerprints - isn't that what they do to criminals?
And the parents - I can't begin to think what it must be like to have your children taken from you. I see the mom in the video that is standing in the street - screaming after the police car for her children. I am also coming to realize that as much as I'd like to think that I would NEVER get myself to the point where my children had to be taken from me - there but for the grace of God go I! Being a mom is the hardest thing I have ever done and there are days when I feel "near the edge". Add in major financial stress, relational and emotional duress and it suddenly doesn't seem so hard to imagine!
I applaud those that work in this field - it is a labor of love. I am sure that they are overworked and underpaid and underappreciated! I admire those that have been willing to take these children into their homes and hearts and have helped them see that it is NOT their fault and that they are valuable and loved by God!
I am still praying about what my (and my family's) piece is in all of this. I am trying to research online and learn more about the system here in Michigan and how it works. And I am looking for a starting place, a place to connect and come alongside and support and assist.
At the Orphan Summit we learned about a National Foster Care Prayer Vigil that Family Life is promoting. It is May 19th - 25th. We are not going to formally host an event, but I am going to encourage those that I know to be a part of praying this next week. I would love by next year to get multiple churches involved and have it be a co-ordinated event! It will be intersting to see where we all are next May!

Mother's Day

2008-05-11T08:06:00.000-07:00

Today I am not at church for Mother's Day. Instead I am home with my sick daughter while my husband has taken the boys to church. Although the doctor thinks she has croup she is actually not seeming overly sick - mostly just hoarse and a little less active, but we don't want to take any chances at infecting anyone else today! I was fine to stay home as I spent all day yesterday at a Womens Retreat.
I have a lot of different thoughts about Mother's Day this year. It's kind of nice to be home with some quiet time so that I can try to process and pray through what I am feeling today.
My main thought is that there are many women around the world today that are sitting at church, sitting home alone, dying under a tree in Africa, that find today more full of pain than celebration. There are also many children that LONG DEEPLY for the love of a mother and have yet to experience it.
I wanted to share some thoughts of another adoptive mother that attended the Orphan Summit last week. Here is the link for her blog.
She was also really moved by Kay Warren's talk. She (Kay) said that she met a woman who was skin and bones dying from Aids. She must have been a week away from death. Kay asked her. "What can I tell the people in America? What can they do for you?" Kay imagined she would say, "Bring me some food or medicine." or "we need money and a warm home" Instead she looked Kay in the eyes and said "Who?Who? who is going to come to take care of my children after I die? what will happen to them?' Kay said she hears the same questions from mothers in China, Russia, India and in places all over the world affected by the AIDS pandemic. When she told this story I just cried picturing Grace, Ella and Jared's sweet birth mom Bayoush. I imagine she had the same plea. I know my wish would be also somehow for my children to never forget me and my love for them. And I would fear they would forget my face and eyes. I would pray they would remember how I looked and smiled at them. I would pray they would always know how very much I loved them and would never ever want to leave them.
In her blog she goes on to say Mother's day is coming next week. Many of us will get dressed up and have our lunches paid for so we won't have to cook. We will enjoy (and should really enjoy and cherish) being in the presence of our children. Or knowing that they are a phone call away. My plea is that we can all remember the children of the world who are orphaned and have no mother's to hold them or read stories to them. I pray that some of you will be inspired to encourage someone else to remember the cries of mother's around the globe who just want to know that someone will come to scoop their children up into their arms and bring them back into a family that will love and take care of them.
So today while I relish in the love of the family that God has graciously given me - I also mourn for the mothers with empty wombs or those who have had to sacrifice raising their sons and daughters. I also grieve for the children who have never felt a mother's embrace. Lord, please forgive me for all the ways I have forgotten these mothers and children that are so dear and precious to your heart. Please show me how I can be a voice and advocate for them from here on out!

Dangerous Surrender - Chapter 2

2008-05-08T11:56:00.001-07:00

I am doing an online book discussion on Dangerous Surrender by Kay Warren - the host of the book discussion is Angel - check out her AWESOME blog here. For the first chapter I put my thoughts in the comments section of her blog, now that I have this space I will have her link her readers to this post.

It's so cool that in the midst of doing this book discussion I had the opportunity to hear Kay Warren speak. Much of what she spoke on was from the book, but there is something about seeing someone in person, hearing their voice and seeing their tears that makes it that much more personal and real.

The title of this Chapter is "The Kingdom of Me". This is the critical part of the concept of Surrender. Am I going to live for God's Kingdom or My Kingdom. Of course, if you were to ask me who I am living for I would give you the answer I think you would want to hear. Kay challenges me to truly look at my life and see by my actions, values, priorities, motives and schedule, which Kingdom is ruling! One of the main passages is Mark 8:34-37 about denying self, taking up our cross, and following Jesus. I have always been fascinated by this passage, because when I think of taking up my cross, I think of Jesus dying on the cross, but the disciples didn't have this in their minds, because He hadn't done it yet. What would have been the disciples understanding of that? If someone had to take up their cross, it meant that they were going to die. It meant that they were going to give up their life. In fact the next part of the passage says "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world , yet forfeit his soul?" I am realizing more and more all the things I do to "save my life" - to make it more comfortable and convenient and to make sure I come out best in all situations. As I become more and more aware of the needs of others and the pain and suffering that others are enduring, I realize that all the effort I put (with or without realizing it) into keeping control of my kingdom is a waste of my time and energy. I want God more than I want my comfortable life. In fact, my comfortable life often keeps me distant from God. How much more real are God's promises and words of comfort to those that are suffering than to me in my comfortable world? Not that I am asking to suffer, but am I willing to enter into another's suffering? Might that cause suffering to enter in my life? Maybe what God is asking me to surrender is a fear of suffering? But maybe that is the very thing that gives me more of GOD!
Angel's two questions to answer:
1. What are the main reasons you don’t want to get too involved with people in dire need? Oh, I think I just kind of answered that. Will it be uncomfortable or inconvenient for me? Will I have to face suffering of my own, or how will I comfort someone who is suffering in a way that I cannot relate to?
2.Kay explains that her growing understanding of God’s sovereign design created an expectation that God would someday use her for his good purposes. Describe your current sense of the purposes God may have in store for you.
I have kind of answered that as well. I am feeling that my purpose lies in the realm of being a voice for oppressed children that have no voice. The waiting child, the orphaned child, the foster child that lives in my neighborhood? God is unfolding His plan for me and I am learning to surrender and to simply follow!

Re: 4th annual Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit

2008-05-07T05:58:00.000-07:00

I had the great opportunity to go with my dear friend Aimee to Ft. Lauderdale last weekend for this awesome event. I am still trying to process all that I heard and learned. I want to take a few minutes to recap the highlights.
The Summit started 4 years ago with 38 leaders in Adoption/Orphan Care ministries. It has doubled each year and this year there were around 600 participants. About 200 were laypeople like Aimee and I that either lead adoption/orphan care ministries at their church or are looking to start one (that would be us!). The Alliance was formed in November of 2007 and it's goal is to "motivate and unify the body of Christ to live out God's mandate to care for the orphan". The Alliance includes Focus on the Family and Family Life Ministries and many other organizations focused on adoption and orphan care. You can check out their website here.
Our first keynote speaker was Dennis Rainey - President of FamilyLife
He spoke of the orphan crisis as a GIANT! And the church as being the PIVOTAL institution to handle the crisis. He gave us a CALL TO ACTION - to not be gluttons of God's Word, by filling up on it, without living it out! He challenged us not to be sold out to a lesser loyalty (comfort, materialism, etc)
The second speaker was Kay Warren - Director of the HIV/AIDS initiative at Saddleback Church and wife of Rick Warren.
I have just recently read her book Dangerous Surrender, so seeing her speak was one of my major highlights! She shared that in all of her international travels she has found that a mother's greatest plea is: "WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF MY CHILDREN WHEN I DIE?" Although I have yet to look death in the face, this resonantes in my heart as I have often thought how devastating it would be for my children to lose me. I feel almost funny to even say that, but in these younger years, their world's revolve around me being there 24/7. Kay asked us what keeps us from moving on behalf of these mother's of the world who will and are leaving behind their children. She says that it will take becoming "seriously disturbed", by all that we learn and see, then making a "dangerous surrender" to God and the work He has called us to. And then we will become "gloriouly ruined" - meaning that normal life will never satisfy in the ways that it previouly did! She was a wonderful storyteller and she was transparent and inspiring! I really admire her, as I believe the work that the Lord has done in her life has affected the evangelical church as a whole to "wake up" to the social justice issues that the church has been all but ignoring (I am generalizing here).
The other keynote speaker that I was IMPACTED by was Bob Coy. He is the Pastor of Calvary Church Ft. Lauderdale which was the host church. He shared about how 10 years ago there was a crisis in the foster system of South Florida. There were many headlines about foster kids sleeping in office buildings, and there were also reports of sexual abuse and children missing from foster homes. ONE women from his church was "seriouly disturbed" about the situation and came to him about it. I loved his honestly in that he did not respond to her initially in fact he said that she "wearied him" about the issue. So as a church they started to get involved, by coming alongside foster parents with babysitting, donating supplies such as cribs, diapers, etc. This led to the pastor challenging the congregation to consider becoming foster parents, which lead to training classes, etc. After a time they bought some local houses and renovated them to become foster homes with houseparents. Ten years later they are 4Kids of South Florida and they have significantly impacted the foster care system. Check out their website - watch a few of their videos and you will be AMAZED! At this session they also had 2 young ladies (now in their early 20's) share about how their lives were transformed by loving foster parents and this program! Both came into the system as teens - I was so challenged as I would tend to think at that point it was too late to really make a difference in that child's life. They both said that even though there were 16 years old they still longed for a family.
I really think God had a great purpose in having the conference at this church and exposing so many of us to the plight of the "modern-day orphan" right here in our own backyards.
It was so encouraging to be with a large group of people with a passion for orphans - so many have worked tirelessly for so long on their behalf. It is exciting to see this FRESH NEW WORK that God is doing. Local churches all over the country are starting adoption/orphan care ministries and GOD IS ON THE MOVE!
Our flight home was quite bumpy as we were flying over a cold front most of the way back. I was able to have some time talking with God as we were flying through the clouds. I had one of those moments where I really felt He was affirming this new passion in my life and letting me know that He would lead my steps and equip me to be a voice for the orphan. As we came down through the clouds, I saw my city all lit up and it took my breath away. God gave me a deep love for the children of this city and an excitement of a new beginning of a new chapter in my life and service for Him!

A new blog for a new adventure!

2008-05-06T11:43:00.000-07:00

For quite some time I have been wanting to do a blog where I can share my heart! Even as I type this my heart quickens as I take the step of putting it out on my sleeve for all to see. So many new thoughts, dreams and desires have been percolating there over the past 9 months. I sense that I am at the beginning of a new adventure, a new chapter, a new calling on my heart directly from the heart of God. It am both frightened and exhilerated as I contemplate all that He could do with my one little life.
The exciting part is that I am not walking this road alone. In the past months, I have discovered that there are others whose heart's beat in a similar pattern - some I am blessed to have in my "real" life and others I have met online. All that came to a culmination this past weekend as I was able to attend the 4th Annual Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit. It was a life-changing weekend and I was able to be informed, inspired and challenged alongside others who have a strong desire to join God's work in caring for the orphans of the world.
I was prompted to really get going on this as some people that I have "met" online have just started the Red Letter's Campaign - here is the link and all the information!